Bigger Than Life Itself

Showbiz or any biz for that matter is going to have its glitches. Any production from a play to a movie to a wedding is going to have missteps and the best admonition I ever heard in that regard was, Those are the things you will remember.

Ask any bride or groom and they'll regale you with the boo-boos because, let's face it, those are what make it special.

A woman once told me she'd spent a year planning for her wedding to take place in a beautiful garden with spectacular catering for the reception.

Mmmm hmmm.

As she was about to walk down a rose-laden aisle to her beloved, she got word that the spectacular caterer took the money and bought a spectacular bag of cocaine to feed his real habit.

She gulped and tearfully asked her helpers to order a gigantic amount of Chinese food. No one will ever forget that wedding.

On the morning of our production I laid out stacks of Shakespeare Club T-shirts. A pile for small, another for medium and one for large. This year the shirts were chocolate brown.

A week before I perused a size large and had serious doubts about it being big enough for our Lord Macbeth. I asked Oliver to go into the washroom and try it on. He came back out with, "Ms. Ryane, it's kinda little."

Kinda?

Damn, it looked like Saran Wrap on the poor fellow. I put a fast call in to the wonderful Cynde (a mother), who commissions our T-shirts every year, and asked if we could get a rush order on an adult size extra-extra.

"Are you certain?" she asked, "He's only ten."

"Oh, I'm certain."

But.

It didn't arrive in time. Yikes.

Cynde and I burrowed into the supply closet where, wonder of wonders, we found a box of school T-shirts that just happened to be the same chocolate brown. Different logo, of course, but no one would see that. Phew. Big phew.

Days after our performance day I called Oliver out of class to present him with his official Shakespeare Club T-shirt with its proper logo of Will Shakespeare.

"Really, for me?" Oliver asked.

"Oh yes, my friend, no one deserves it more. Your Macbeth was stellar and you were so tolerant of my boo-boo with the size."

"Oh, that's okay, Ms. Ryane," he said while holding up the shirt to admire it.

Phew.

CHILDREN'S WRITES: A Journal Entry

I wanted power was when was a kid then I will rule the word and any one that wanted to talk about me they will get there head choped off and then I will lolz.

I wanted revenge when my cuzin hit me and she pucned me. I wanted revenge because Geneva hurt me relly bad I was going to cry

I wanted revenge because Geneva allmost broke my bed because we have bunk beds and I have the top and my brother the bottom.

—Wendy, 3rd grade